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Feelings like self-doubt and inadequacy can drive us to overeat. Yet if we listen to conventional self-help to “just ignore your inner critic and crush your fears”, you lose self-trust. In this nuanced conversation, I talk with Melody Wilding, a licensed social worker, TEDx speaker and Human Behavior faculty member at the City University of New York. In today’s episode, we discuss the:
- The counter-intuitive way to make self-doubt an ally, not an enemy
- How being highly conscientious gives you a competitive edge yet can also turn into a weakness and how to mitigate the downside of being so on the ball
- The impostor syndrome and how it gets high achievers to question so much about themselves and the solution is NOT to play to your strengths! One of the many powerful tools Melody shares is the tool HALT. When you’re feeling “stressed” or “overwhelmed”, say HALT and then ask yourself: am I hungry, angry, lonely or tired?
When clients explore their reasons for overeating, many find being tired as one root cause of turning to carbs. Carbs are a quick energy boost to push through (chocolate is a bonus with caffeine).
This surprises clients. They don’t necessarily feel tired. But when they bring curiosity to their cravings, they see what’s always been there, but overlooked.
Try out the HALT tool yourself to start to get an accurate “diagnosis” of your own cravings.
And definitely listen to the rest of this episode for more golden nuggets. Many listeners told me they listened to this three times with pages of notes!
More About Melody
In addition to her professional background, Melody helps high-achievers navigate the emotional ups-and-downs of success. Melody has worked with CEOs and executives running top startups along with published authors and media personalities.
For the last 10 years she’s studied the connection between thoughts, emotions, and actions. Now Melody helps her clients develop concrete strategies to overcome their insecurities, increase confidence, and build self-esteem that unleash their full potential.
She speaks at Fortune 500 companies, colleges, and conferences across the country about the psychology of success. In her recent TEDx talk, she shared a surprising, counter-intuitive way to overcome “Impostor Syndrome” and make self-doubt an ally, not an enemy.
Melody is an award-winning expert in workplace mental health and writes for Forbes, Inc., Quartz, and PsychCentral.com and others. She’s been featured in dozens of major media outlets including New York Magazine, Fast Company, Entrepreneur Magazine, and more.
Melody holds a Masters from Columbia University and graduated summa cum laude with a degree in Psychology from Rutgers University.
Want more confidence in just 5 days? Grab her free e-course, 5 DAYS TO FREEDOM FROM SELF-DOUBT at melodywilding.com/youarenotafraud.
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Angela Marchesani
This is the most important, empowering message I’ve ever heard about the highly sensitive person. To be empathic, introspective and conscientious CAN feel burdensome at times; it’s like we can’t claim ignorance. Once you know the impact of your words and your work, you can’t be careless with them. But it is also a HUGE blessing and gift. I loved this episode. Thank you!
Ali Shapiro
Wow! So glad you could see the truth in Melody’s work. Thanks for tuning in Angela and always adding your own brilliance to our health conversations. We need you!